The 6th Element Called Love

It is wonderful to see how inconspicuous things can ignite the interest of the masses in short spans of time. But then, what I am referring to might not seem “inconspicuous” to most Indians as we have a modicum of the Bollywood glitz coursing our veins. Under the scanner is the title of Imtiaz Ali’s recent release “Love Aaj Kal” (Love Today and Yesterday). As soon as the title of the movie was made public, inaudible debates started about golden age of romance. Was the love of yesterday better? Or does the love of today win hands-down? The publicity department of the movie did everythign to escalate this debate to the extent that it became a major talking point in tabloids, coffee-shopsm radio chat-shows and popular hangout spots.

Though I have been in the aforementioned debate more than once, I hereby rest my case for the masses to read and to absorb. The debate is always about the style of romance that has changed over the years. In the earlier years, the more subtle expressions of love were considered in vogue. The “oldies”, as we call the people of that time, did not believe in public display of affection (or PDA). The expression of love was confined to the privacy of the four walls of the house. Courtship was a long and slow process, with the femlae being the coy entity and the male being the dominant entity. The process of wooing the female took immense time, but not financial resources. The males were more gentleman-like, chivalrous and any female’s dream. They respected the women and treated them with extreme care and offered protection from all the evils in the world. Women were also more submissive and dependent on men for survival. Love letters were the only means of communication for couples who were apart. The postal services (or a pigeon in the movies) was the messenger of love. Letters were well thought-out and writing a letter was, in itself, an art. Entwining so many palpable emotions in a coherent letter was the target of every lover who wrote a letter to his/her other half. For the sake of brevity, we can call it the “age of patience in passion”. But then, people, at that point in history, had time at hand. The lives of people was not as fast-paced as it is today. The leisurely pace gave them ample amount of time to introspect, plan, wait and dream about the next meeting.

The current generation (my generation) is always short of time. We have lives that are much faster than the previous generation and with each passing day, the alacrity of life passes that break-neck mark revised each day. We live in ferociously fast times and patience is one trait that has been either lost or supressed for the sake of survival. As a consequence, we have lesser time for the romantic affairs. “There is no time to stop and stare”. The expressions of love have changed from subtle and sureeptitious to more candid ones. The first meeting is the make-or-break point of the relationship. The first 15 minutes are enough to decide the fate of the romantic liaison. Courtship has diminished to the asking the phone number and perhaps a “proposal” for the more fortunate ones. Flaunting ones affection for his/her lover is the new trend. How many young couples do you see in public places who are not holding hands? Very few. Technology has altered the meaning of “distance”. Postal services are out, SMS and cell-phones are in. With advancement in means of communication, separation has never been easier for two people in love. Yet, the extreme pace of it all has made it tougher for the strings to bind together. More relationships break as compared to new relationships forged. Women are more independent. they decide what they have to do with their lives. Males are still…males. In the hustle-bustle, we often miss the sublime euphoria. But, we are happy with the adrenalin rush that accompanies the short stint.

But I will not go so far as to say that love today is worse off than love yesterday. The reason is that “Love” is the 6th element of life (the other five being earth, water, fire, air and sky according to Hindu mythology). Love is immutable. From the antediluvian era to today, love has not changed in any aspect. It is still as pure as it was before the advent of humanity. What I am referring to might be better understood if I replace “Love” with “True Love”. But then, come to think of it, “True Love” is a phrase we have coined to refer to the purest form of love that exists. Amazingly, there is no other form of love. Love is a unique entity. We cannot have an “untrue” form of love. Call it “Love” or “true Love” or whatever you may, it always refers to the same set of emotions. It refers to the bond of trust between two people, the emotions they share. Both the people laugh when joy encompasses them, both cry when disaster strikes. Yet, one of them maintains the equanimity and tries to restore the smile on the other’s face. If you come to think of it, the love Adam and Eve shared, the love Romeo and Juliet shared, the love Shahjahan and Mumtaz shared is not any different from the love we share with our loved ones; it is the same. Like water and air, two essentials of life which have not altered their behaviour or composition over the years, love, the third essential of human life, has also refused change. Perhaps the tendency of the elements to remain the same is in the best interest of mankind. I cannot fathom what life would be in case love actually became the short-lived impulse which some of us, ever so naively, call love.

I agree the expression of love has changed over the years. But the invisible but unbreakable bond joining two souls has not changed, and never will. Love, the actual, pure and unadulterated version of it, though an endangered phenomenon, is alive in the hearts of those who believe in it. It does not come to those who seek adrenalin, it comes to those who wipe tears and share smiles. It does not come to those who break hearts, but to those who pray for the joy of the other with a broken heart. It does not come those who hurt others, but to those who have tears on their cheeks but a smile on their lips. And when it does come, it is the same rush of joy which Adam had felt.

Believe it or not, Love is Immutable.

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Tags: Bollywood, Imtiaz Ali, Life, Love, Love Aaj Kal, True love

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